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Chill Time

Life was finally heading back to “normal,” Luna was still having her moments of zoning out but wasn’t as bad as the first time. She learned that when she was zoning out to pinch herself in the arm to wake up to see what is going on. She didn’t want to be on autopilot during the entire school day. She hardly spoke with Aaron after that day he chose to be her knight in shining armor, but she knew he had to do damage control for his girlfriend to not be worried about Aaron cheating on her with a 6th grader. Luna started walking to all her classes with someone she knew, it was her way of staying present without looking suspicious. She even started walking with Oliver to class because she wanted to spend more time with him. When they got to chorus class, the teacher/conductor told everyone to find their seats immediately.
“Okay class, this week is MPA. I have all your permission slips to go. Remember, missing this performance will be an automatic fail in this class. We have been focusing on this performance since the beginning of the school year. The outfit for the day is a plain black dress and black flats.” She already gave the permission slip in over 2 weeks. She wasn’t even focusing on the performance, she was focusing on what Aaron said about Oliver. She looked at Oliver with a look that he couldn’t recognize, because she couldn’t tell what to do because she does love Oliver more than anything.
“You okay, girlie?” She felt his whisper all the way to the other side of her. She got goosebumps, she never got those before. She looked at his eyes, they kept saying something she didn’t understand so she smiled as big as she could.
“I am fine, just a bit nervous for MPA. Aren’t you?” True to an extent.
“No, but I also know you’re lying, so are you okay?” Her eyes blew up, she didn’t think he would know that she was lying but what could she expect, he has known her longer than others. She didn’t know what to do because she wanted to tell him what Aaron said and ask if he trusts me with other guys?
“Yes dork, I am fine. Why wouldn’t I be okay?” He gave her a faint smile and she couldn’t help but feel guilty for hiding her feelings toward him. She needed more time to figure out what she wanted to do about everything between them. She wanted to make sure that she didn’t do something because she loved him or worse do something out of love.
Class finished quickly and she saw Aaron walking toward her.
“Sup dummy, ready for class?” He usually walked past her for weeks because of his girlfriend, Luna just assumed it was because he made nice with her.
“No, but I don’t have a choice but to go. The teacher already saw me today. Aren’t you supposed to take your girlfriend to class?”
“Oh yeah, we broke up last week. She was making it seem like you were faking it a couple weeks back to stay by my side. I even told her that you had someone, she didn’t trust me with you, so I broke up with her.” Luna didn’t want to be the cause of another break up. She could feel her breath getting faster, she gestured to Aaron to take to a corner quickly. She stopped in her tracks, all she could hear was ‘you did this.’ ‘we were happy without you here,’ ‘you make him miserable.’ Luna put her hands on her ears, she didn’t know how to shut it up this time. It was louder. She couldn’t hear her own thoughts because of it. Aaron tried to hold her hands as he stood in front of her in case she was crying. She was trying to think of something to shut it up.
Oliver. Think of him. How he made her feel, how he would hold her when she was leaning on him, how she would wish they could go back and give dating another chance. Think about the hint of trees on him as if he would be coming from the forest. Think about how his soft brown eyes would look at her as if she was his whole world.
“Luna, are you okay?” She looked up and it was Oliver. She figured that Aaron told him to come over to see if he could help. She didn’t know what to say and she hated when he would see her crying so she hugged him.
“I am now. Can you walk me to class please?” Aaron wasn’t even insulted that she didn’t want to walk with him. He was more worried about Luna than anything.
“I would love to walk you to class girlie, but I am heading home early and I was going to tell you earlier but you were on autopilot mode again.” She let him go and she didn’t know what to do or say.
“Oh, I hope everything is okay,” she looked at Aaron. “We have to go to class.” Aaron was shocked by this whole moment between two 6th graders. Luna started walking again and didn’t look back because she was scared that if she did look back at Oliver she would go over to him and kiss him.
“Thank you for helping me again.” She looked at Aaron, who looked like his brain was trying to understand what just happened. She started noticing some of his features, he had a bit of a beard growing for a 7th grader.
“Luna…what did I just watch? I keep replaying it and I am still trying to understand what happened? You were having a whole panic attack and he came over, you calmed down and then got immediately sad because he was leaving early.” When he worded it like that, it sounds like a parent was walking out on their kid’s life for good.
“So I had a mini attack, I’ll say that for sure but to calm myself down I was thinking about Oliver. When I opened my eyes, he was right in front of me, that’s why I wanted him to walk me to class so then I can calm down a bit more.”
“Okay, but what caused the attack?” She was saved by the fact that they were at her class.
“I will tell you later on the bus, okay?”

 
 
 

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