As days went by, she heard nothing from her dad. She knew that she hurt him after everything that had happened, but she didn’t care enough anymore. She felt like she was betrayed by someone who claimed to love her. She was constantly switching from going to her mom’s job to Marc’s job, she was never home alone; she was okay with that but then there were moments when she wished she could have stayed home. It was the day of Christmas Eve, she wished that her dad did reach out at least once but it was silent on his side. She wasn’t mad or depressed about it anymore, she also knew that Derek and Aaron were out of town which made the break go even longer. She would wander the complex aimlessly without a care in the world.
“Hey, don’t forget. We are going to Marc’s parent’s house tonight, how do you want me to do your hair?” Right! They were going to Marc’s parent’s house…or how she thought of it was her own personal hell.
“Can you curl my hair?”
“Curl it?”
“Yeah, is that possible?”
“Sure is. I will start your hair in 2 hours, don’t go too far today. Okay?” She didn’t want to go far, but she wanted to just get out of her own head even for a few minutes. She starts walking and humming the songs she needed to rehearse.
“We can't/We can't back down/We can't/We can't back down/Not right now/We can't back down/Not right now/We can't back down/We can't back down/Don't close your eyes/We're all in this together/Wherever we draw the line/We're not gonna straddle across it/Or lose it”
As she was singing, she started doing the dance moves. She was having fun with the moves. She didn’t care if anyone was watching her have fun, she needed a good time and she wasn’t going to let anyone stop her. As she was walking around, she could feel someone watching her but she didn’t know who or where they were.
“Whoever is watching me needs to stop because it’s creepy now. Please come out.” As Luna was saying this out loud, she realized that she didn’t know who was looking at her and she could get killed for being stupid. She saw no one coming out of dark corners in any area. She decided to start walking back home to make things easier for her, she couldn’t get killed if she was home with her family, unless…they follow her home and kill her whole family. OKAY! STOP! That was way too far even for Luna to think about.
“You know you aren’t the smartest girl in the world, thank goodness I do know you and I already know how you go to the extremes.” Thank goodness it was Jessica. She didn’t care if it was Jessica, but she just wished that she had come out when Luna said something.
“Jesus! Jessica! Say something next time instead of being creepy. I was ready to run home from the amount of creepiness.”
“Sorry, I was watching you practice and I didn’t realize that you can sing that great. How long have you been singing?”
“Since 3rd grade, I thought you knew this already?”
“I did but since I never heard you sing before today so I thought you were lying.” Wow…okay. Luna wasn’t expecting that response but it made sense.
“Yeah, it’s true. You could have asked me to sing something to prove it to you so you didn’t think I was lying this entire time until today.”
“No because that is so rude to just be like ‘omg you sing, sing something then.’” Also a good point.
“True but I would have understood. Is there a specific song you would have asked me to sing when I told you that I could sing?”
“Not really but what would you have sang if I did ask?”
“I would have sung Battlefield by Jordin Spark.”
“Can you sing it for me? If you don’t want to, you don’t have to.” Luna smiled at her, she was okay with singing to Jessica.
“Sure. Don't try to explain your mind/I know what's happening here/One minute it's love and suddenly it's like a battlefield/One word turns into war/Why is it the smallest things that tear us down?/My world's nothing when you're gone/I'm out here without a shield/Can't go back now/Both hands tied behind my back for nothing, oh no/These times when we climb so fast to fall again/Why we gotta fall for it now?” As she finished that part, she could see Jessica’s face light up like the 4th of July. She didn’t know that Jessica was going to be this excited about Luna singing, but she wasn’t the one to judge someone on their excitement since she would get excited hearing a beautiful harmony.
“Luna! You are an amazing singer! Why have you been holding this to yourself?”
“I mean, I’m not but not everyone wants to hear me sing so I don’t push it on people.”
“Whoever doesn’t like hearing you sing, then they have a problem because you are incredible.” Luna couldn’t help but feel the happiness warming up her insides, she was used to her closer guy friends like Oliver or Matthew, but when it came to girls saying it…she couldn’t tell if it was a compliment or a sarcastic insult.
“Well, thank you Jessica. Again, if you ever want me to sing something for you just let me know. I will gladly do so, but I have to head home because my mom is doing my hair.”
“Oooo! Go make yourself look more beautiful! I’ll see you when school starts again.”
“See you then. Bye!” As Luna was walking back to her apartment, she realized why she didn't sing a Christmas song, but also why didn’t Jessica ask her to sing a Christmas song? Questions for another day, maybe even never. As Luna got back home, she looked around and had a sudden urge of calm hit her, as if she was safe again. She was struggling with the idea of safety for herself for awhile, but now she feels it again.
“Luna, don’t wash your hair because for me to do your hair curly I need to straighten it before I curl it.”
“Okay, fine by me. I was just going to warm myself up. It is a bit colder out there than I hoped for.”
“Good to know. I will start your hair in an hour.” Instead of responding Luna gave her mom two thumbs up to show that she understood. Luna couldn’t help but think of other songs that she needed to work on, of course she had the one from the school show but she felt like she was missing a song or two. She did wish she had chorus, she wished that she could be sitting on the top row on the soprano's side next to Oliver hearing him hit a note that was just slightly sharp. She missed telling him that his notes were sharp and they would get into little arguments about it, she just missed Oliver. She wanted to talk to him the most, he was the only guy that truly made her feel like she wasn’t alone in the world.
After her mom did her hair, Luna had to put on the outfit her mom picked out for her. It was a black and white dress; Luna never told her mom that she didn’t like dresses but she didn’t want to wear one when she was constantly made fun of for her size. Luna would constantly describe herself as an orange because she was round like one, she didn’t like how her body was looking but she didn’t like that everyone made fun of her for it. She would constantly look at Kennedy’s skinny body and wanted to hit her because she was able to wear everything and anything because she was skinny while Luna had to fight to look for pants her size and shirts that would hide everything. She looked at herself in the dress and she was questioning why this dress, why? She didn’t take it off, she went out to show everyone and her mom looked happy to see that the dress looked either beautiful or that it fit Luna.
“You look beautiful Luna. I am so glad you gave the dress a chance.” It wasn’t an option when she thought about it, the dress was in her closet with a note that said ‘wear me or be punished.’ She was just glad to have her mom smiling at her without any other reason.
“Thanks, I think it is pretty.”
“Let me take photos of you in the dress in front of the tree.” Oh, not the photos. She didn’t want reminders of this dress on her, she didn’t want proof that she knew how to look beautiful. She wanted her body to stay hidden. After taking over 50 photos, Marc finally told everyone to get into the car to go to his parent’s house. Here is where things are going to get interesting.
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