Luna was getting on the bus to forget the last 5 minutes.
“So, who was the guy holding your hands?” Thanks Lucy for shouting her out. Lucy couldn’t keep her mouth shut.
“That was my friend Matthew, and he wasn’t holding my hand, we were talking about how tall he is next to me.” After, she said that she saw Aaron looking slightly relieved that he was just a friend to her.
“What are you talking about? Y’all look like the cutest couple ever! Aaron, don’t they look so cute together?” Luna’s eyes were ready to blow out of her face, Lucy trying to start problems, but no one knew why.
“I think she looks like that with anyone, but I believe her that they are just friends. Maybe, don’t make Luna look bad.” Woah! Woah! WOAH! Let’s just STOP! Luna didn’t want this to happen and she definitely didn’t want Aaron involved. Hold on, what did he mean by that line? She doesn’t have the time for all of this.
“Girls! You are both pretty! Me and Matthew are just friends, nothing more and nothing less. Please stop arguing about me, I am just trying to chill after today’s chaos.” She didn’t think she was going to snap but this was an annoying conversation about her.
“Yeah guys, Luna already has a boyfriend and she loves him so much.” Thank you Tabitha for adding fuel to the fire.
“What? Since when? Who?” Lucy was asking the right questions.
“Yeah, Luna, who is this boyfriend you love so much?” Aaron was eating this moment up.
“Well, my boyfriend’s name is Oliver and I do love him very much, so much that I broke up with him today and I don’t want to talk about it, if I am completely honest and I am not in the mood to date.” That was a good save just in case anyone knows Oliver this is happening to her and his name is involved. She looked at Aaron’s face and he was trying not to smile about the so-called break up. Luna did look like her heart was crushed, which sadly it wasn’t wrong. She hated finding out that she wouldn’t see Oliver like that this year.
“Oh no, Luna, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know, why didn’t you say anything earlier? I would have shut up about you and your friend Matthew.” Luna was definitely over this conversation. She couldn’t deal with it anymore, she just put her headphones on and leaned on Jessica’s shoulder and just stayed quiet.
When Luna got off the bus, she didn’t want to talk to anyone so she walked home in silence. She waited for a few minutes to take a walk around to calm down. She missed having Aaron as a friend but after seeing his reactions to the whole Matthew to then Oliver’s breakup, it means that he wants her still like that.
“Luna?” She turned around to see Aaron.
“Aaron, what are you doing here? I don’t want to be around anyone right now.” Nothing she said was wrong.
“I was worried about you. You don’t usually stay that quiet.”
“Well you have a funny way of showing that you were worried about me.”
“What do you mean?”
“I look like that with everyone? Really, what does that mean exactly?”
“Nothing bad, you just look like a girlfriend to everyone. I just said it because you are my friend and I should be able to make jokes like that.” Jokes? That’s what he called something so rude. How would that be funny? Like come on Aaron, Luna hates this!
“That joke wasn’t funny for me and I wasn’t okay with it at all. I was heartbroken by it all. I wasn’t okay finding out that I don’t get to see Oliver this entire year. I already want to cry about it but hearing you make a joke like that hurts me more than anything.” Luna couldn’t help but feel like she was about to break down and cry.
“Luna, it isn’t that serious, you know that right?”
“You can’t say that to me, because aren’t me. I want to scream and cry because the guy I love is being distant with me, I just can’t deal with all of that but adding your joke made me feel worse.” She stopped moving and just dropped to her knees, she wanted to cry but instead she just stopped thinking and worse she forgot how to walk all together. She didn’t know what to do because saying it out loud made her break, she found herself trying to find the words to even speak was difficult.
“Luna? Are you okay? Do you need help?” Aaron was freaking out in front of her. In his defense, she just stopped talking and just fell to her knees. She just couldn’t handle the hard truth, would this be the end of her and Oliver? She missed him more than anything. She had to get up, she had to say something, Aaron looks like he is about to call 9-1-1.
“I’m fine Aaron.” Luna finally got herself to speak and that was all she could say without cracking from the pain in her heart.
“To hell you’re fine! Luna, I feel like I should take you to the hospital. The hospital is right there, I will give you a piggyback ride over there and I won't leave your side until your scary mom comes.” Oh go no! Luna! GET UP! You go to the hospital, you will get in more trouble than Aaron will ever know.
“No Aaron, no hospitals. I can’t go to the hospital, I will get in so much trouble. I will be fine, just help me up.” Aaron offered his hand to help get up, he pulled her up so fast that she almost fell forward onto his chest, she couldn’t handle all this, these feelings. She couldn’t help but hear his heart beating fast. This was too much for Luna and it’s worse because she was blushing again. STOP THE MADNESS! Luna tries to prove that she can be loyal to Oliver even though she isn’t seeing him this year, she is keeping that promise for herself.
“Luna, are you okay? What happened just now? I don’t want to leave you especially now.” No! She needs to get away from Aaron, away from everyone.
“Aaron, look I know that these past few minutes made me look bad, but I need to be alone.” She stayed calm while saying it. She needed Aaron to believe her at this moment.
“Luna, I don’t think you should be alone like I know I don’t have the best history with you alone, but I want to help you. I do care about you. Please don’t push me away, I hate it when you push me away.” She doesn’t want to push anyone away but she can’t be around him right now, she is ready to cry, but she also wants to do something stupid.
“Aaron, I’m not pushing you away, I just…,” Luna stopped for a second time and stopped thinking about every thought in her head. “...I just want to be alone, nothing is going to happen. I just want to take a shower and lay down. I will probably walk my dog in an hour and I will shower and take a nap because I am just tired. You don’t need to stay by my side and I’m not inviting you into my home either so don’t worry. I will be fine.” She had to believe it herself to make Aaron believe her. She didn’t believe that was going to happen, but she didn’t want to have any more issues. She just wanted to go home alone and be okay with being alone.
“Do I wanna believe you, yes. Will I? No. You are my friend and I am worried about you. I will let you go home but tomorrow, I want to help you with it.” He has his reasons to think this way but Luna really was tired and ready for bed. Usually the first day of school was draining for Luna because she would have had to deal with talking to new people but also knowing that her current friends didn’t speak to her at all during the summer. She always hated that the only person that spoke to her at all this summer was Aaron. Aaron was the only one that cared about her, even more than Oliver which killed her more. She couldn’t help but hug Aaron tight.
“Thank you for caring about me. No matter what anyone says, you are truly great to me and I don’t deserve you. So thank you, you’re the only one that actually came over to check on me after my outburst.” She didn’t cry this time, she just didn’t want to see him cry either because she knew he was tearing up from her words. As she was going to let him go, Aaron held her tighter, which meant he didn’t want Luna seeing him this way.
“Please don’t let go, I can’t handle all of your sweet words sometimes.” Which was fair, she hardly complimented Aaron in front of everyone, just when they were alone.
“Fine, but I do have to go soon. I want your help but I can’t ask you to help me all the time. It’s not you, it’s me.” Gosh, Luna felt like she was breaking up with Aaron even though they weren’t together. She hated using the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ line, she hated when every movie break up said that line, she always wanted to say out loud why?! Why is it ‘me?’ At this moment, it was her, she needed to try and rely on herself for once. Luna just didn’t want to be around people, she just wanted to be alone.
“Luna, I want to always help you. Why do you feel like you need to handle this alone?”
“I have to because at the end of the day I can’t ask for help from my family and as you can tell my friends are quick to throw me under the bus for no reason.” Which isn’t wrong, Luna hated that Lucy and Tabitha were okay to say things like that.
“Luna, don’t let them get to you, you have been dealing with a bigger issue than what people know. Just like I know they don’t know what happened between us this summer and why you chose to avoid me the rest of the summer, which thank you for that.” She couldn’t deny that line, she did avoid him after the kiss, it wasn’t because she hated him or anything like that, it was more like she didn’t know how to approach the situation. She was scared that she would make it worse especially since she has zero experience in this situation. She couldn’t go to her mom and she didn’t know when the next time she was going to see Laurissa.
“I’m sorry about everything, I’m sorry that you feel the need to be my hero all the time. I’m sorry that I kissed you, I’m sorry that our friendship has changed because I relied on you so much. That was never my plan, like I love you but as an older brother, it is always okay to fight someone that made me cry.” She meant every word because she felt like she was going to continuously have issues with her and Aaron because of ‘unspoken’ feelings. She wanted it to be over even though she didn’t want to lose the friendship she has with him.
“You don’t have to be sorry, I should be. I told you that I would never look at you this way, but here I am breaking that promise. I don’t regret that kiss but I understand why you avoided me the rest of the summer, I did deserve that because I kept pushing my feelings onto you. I told Derek about the whole thing, he called me a scumbag because you felt like you couldn’t figure out how to get me to understand. I felt like crap after Derek explained everything to me. I wanted to fix everything but every time I went outside, you were in your own world with your music. I didn’t want to ruin your mood because I wanted to apologize. I want you to know that I am sorry for causing issues.” Wow, she had nothing to say, she wanted to thank Derek for helping her through this situation. Luna was slightly happy that Aaron finally understood how she was feeling toward him. She didn’t know what to say to him but she felt guilty even though she knew she did everything correctly.
“Aaron, I don’t think of you as a scumbag, but I am glad Derek said something because I like our friendship and I said that during that summer and I know you said you wouldn’t be mad at me but I felt like you were going to be mad at me for leading you on as well.” Aaron looked shocked by her response, but she wasn’t going to lie to him. She hasn’t before and she wasn’t going to start at this moment.
“Luna, I wouldn’t be mad at you, especially for sharing your feelings. I should have listened to you the first time but I thought I would be another Oliver for you, but I understand I won’t be.” Hearing Aaron say Oliver’s name was a slight pinch to her heart because she still missed him.
“I’m sorry Aaron, but I love one guy and his name is Oliver and he knows that. I know our friend has changed way too much to go back to normal, so does that mean we don’t talk to each other?” She was hoping that he would say no, but also he would say yes. She couldn’t handle losing another friend, but with all these issues, she would be okay with losing this friend.
“No, geez Luna! You aren’t losing me as a friend but I will put some more distance between us and I’ll try dating someone so I don’t focus on you as much.” That should have told her that she didn’t like him like that, knowing that she was okay with seeing Aaron with another girl. She had zero feeling of jealousy, she was actually happy with that idea, she didn’t want Aaron to be waiting fo rLuna to make her mind when she already did.
“I’m glad. Now, can I finally go home? I just want to lay down in my bed with my dog.” Hopefully he says yes.
“You are free from my clutches, but tomorrow you will let me know if you need me. I know you are going to reject the idea but I would rather you say it out loud than hold in all of your weird and confusing feelings.” She gave him one more hug, when she let go of him, she looked into his eyes to see it all. She saw his pain and rejection in his big hazel green eyes, she could tell that this conversation hurt him more than it hurt her; she hated that she could read him by his eyes because she could do that to Oliver too. Lune went upstairs to see Chewie sitting right in front of the door waiting for her to get inside.
“Hey Chewie! Who's a good boy? Are you ready to go out? Let me drop my bag off and I will.” Yes, she speaks to Chewie. She needed someone to listen to her that wasn't going to have feelings for her or tell her what she should do which she needed. She needed to let herself breathe and just let herself rant even if she knew no one was responding.
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