Three weeks have passed since Luna has been in school after that horrible break. She could still feel the pain that came from that break, but she got closer to Oliver because of it. She had no choice but to tell him; she was breaking down. More and more weeks were passing because she was just remembering all the horrible things that were happening in her dad’s house.
“Hey Oliver, do you think I should audition for the talent show?”
“Why? You don’t have any talents.” Sometimes Oliver likes to forget that Luna can sing.
“You’re right, maybe I shouldn’t. Thanks for the honesty.” She decided that day that she was going to sign up for the talent show and show the school that she can sing. The big question was… what song was she going to sing?
“Girlie, I hope you know I am kidding. I think you should audition for the talent show. I am auditioning for it.” Wait… now he wants her to audition… Now she is more confused about whether to audition.
“Even if I audition, what would I do? Like you said, I have no talent.”
“Girlie, you and I both know that you can sing your little heart out. You are a good singer, show the school the amazing singer you are.” Wow! Oliver just read my mind completely, and it’s amazing that he could read my mind like it was nothing.
“Wow, thanks Oliver that you think that… but I don’t know what to sing or if I want to embarrass myself in front of the entire school. I never sang in front of the entire school alone, with the chorus, yes, and in music class; other than those two moments, I don’t think I can do it.” She wasn’t lying either. Usually she would lie to get out of situations that would cause her anxiety to spike. Which was worse because she didn’t know what anxiety was during this time period. She just thought she had hardcore stage fright; even though she has been on the stage, since she was younger thanks to her family for putting her in ballet.
“Luna, I believe in you. The worst they could do is say no to you, which if they do that, then they don’t know talent unless it hits them in the face.”
“Thanks Oliver, really thanks.” Something Oliver didn’t know about her was that her parents weren’t the most supportive of her love of music. She barely sang at home because she would get told that she wasn’t good as “sick jokes”, but also she got told to be quiet by everyone. She just gave up singing at home.
“So, are you going to audition with me?”
“Sure, why not? Like you said, the worst that would happen is they say no.”
“Now the question is… what song are you going to sing?” Good question… What song was she going to sing?
“I don’t know yet… I have to go home and figure it out. Do you know what you are doing as your talent?” Luna had a couple of songs in her head but she didn’t know which one was going to be the song that would make her stand out, out of all the singers that was going to audition. She thought about singing Kelly Clarkson, Taylor Swift, Rihanna, and even Miley Cyrus.
“My talent is going to be dancing, since I am a good tap dancer, thanks to my grandfather.” She didn’t know that he could tap dance. It was incredible that he could do that. She wished she could tap dance, but she knew there would be no point because she wouldn’t be able to practice at home.
“That’s so cool Oliver, I hope you get to perform that because that would be awesome to see you on that stage tapping away.”
“Thanks girlie, but stop avoiding the question. Are you going to audition with me?”
“I said sure.”
“That’s not a definite yes, girlie. I will believe you when you say yes.”
“Fine, yes, I will audition with you. Happy?”
“Very!” He had this huge smile on his face — it made her more nervous because she questioned how Oliver had heard her sing before. She rarely sings in public. It’s also the fact that he was excited about what song I was singing. Luna was excited to see him tap dance. She had never seen him tap dance before. He has shown up to school with all his tap dancing gear on him, but he has never shown her some of his tap dancing routine.
As the day was passing, she couldn’t help but feel more nervous. She was finally going to talk to her dad after a month and eight days after him bringing her home early; she didn’t know what she wanted to say to him. She wanted to bring up how she was going to audition for the talent show, like how Laurissa and Sammy said she should at least tell him. She was looking at her mother before taking her phone to call him. She could tell that Luna was extremely nervous. Luna felt like she was about to have a heart attack just because she was going to talk to her dad.
“Luna, you don’t have to talk to him. It’s okay if you don’t want to. I will just say you have a lot of homework to do. Or we don’t pick up the call.” Her mother was right, she didn’t have to talk to him. She didn’t want to feel his pain again. She was finally feeling better after that horrible break. Don’t get Luna wrong, her mom and stepdad made up for her dad’s recklessness and carelessness. She knew she had to hear his voice just to make sure that he was okay.
“I can do this. I can do anything if I set my mind to it.” She was lying through her teeth, but her mother didn’t need to know that part because then she wouldn’t let her talk to her dad.
She took her mother’s phone into the room and called her dad… she heard the ringing as she was waiting patiently. She brought herself to the last time she spoke with him.
“I don’t know when I will get to see you. I don’t know when I will get to talk to you again. I love you, just remember that.” She only remembered that line because that was the last line she heard before her mother took the phone and told him to stop making her cry. Which led to a fight that hurt her more, because it was right in front of her.
“Hello?”
“Hi dad.”
“Luna, my sweet Luna; how are you, honey?”
“I’m fine, just busy with school activities. I am working with the TV station and I am a part of the safety patrol.”
“Cool, what's a safety patrol? What do you do at the TV station?”
“Safety patrol is like hall monitors but for after school to help the younger kids to cross the streets and get where they are meant to be. At the TV station, I work with the cameras and help my teacher with working the green screen for morning announcements. It’s so much fun.” Just thinking about everything she does in school made her question what she wanted to do with her life. She didn’t know what she wanted to do. She loved singing, but she did like working with the TV station. She thought about it, and she felt like he wasn’t listening to her at all then again, she couldn’t see his face as she was telling him all this. She felt like he just had the phone on the bed and was waiting until she finished speaking.
“That’s cool, honey.”
“What’s wrong?” And this was the moment Luna realized she screwed up her entire life.
“Oh honey, I just miss you. I wish I could see you, but I don’t have the money to see you. I don’t have a car, and I have been using Laurissa’s car when she doesn’t need it. Sammy has been trying to help me get a job, since I lost my job because I couldn’t come in. I might move into that weird house behind Laurissa’s home. Do you know which one I am talking about?” She was trying to process everything that was going on in that call, especially since her dad was crying on the call. Usually, it’s the other way around… but hearing him cry, she was getting choked up.
“Yeah, I know the house you are talking about. That’s cool, though. You will see Laurissa, Sammy, and the boys more than you see me. When you have me, I will just walk across the backyard to see them.” She was trying to find some positivity in this mess.
“That’s the spirit, honey. I have to go though, I am on a tight budget. Is there anything else you wanted to tell me before I hung up?” This is the moment. Luna had to decide whether she told him she was auditioning for her school’s talent show, but after hearing all the bad things in his life. She didn’t want to make him feel guilty for not being there for her.
“No, not at all. What about you?”
“I wanted to tell you I love you and that I miss you.”
“I love you too, dad, and I miss you too.” We hung up at the same time. She couldn’t help but feel like she was hurting him more than she thought. She didn’t want that call to end, but she wished it finished faster. She went out to the living room. Her mother was waiting for Luna to tell her what was wrong.
“He lost his job. He has no car. He might live in a house that looks like it will fall down any day of the week. I’m scared for him, but I stayed positive for him.” As she said that, her heart sank more and more than she was going down the list.
“He did it to himself, Luna. Just remember that. You aren’t responsible for your father’s actions. Okay?”
“Okay.” What Luna didn’t know was that worrying about her father’s actions was going to haunt her until later on in her life. She just focused on some type of positivity in her life. She thought about Oliver and how he is excited for them both to audition for the talent show. Luna went back out to the living room.
“Mom, I am trying out for the school talent show.” At least she was telling a parent, Laurissa and Sammy never specified which parent I told.
“Nice. Good luck.” That was it. She just shrugged it off, just like all of Luna’s accomplishments. When she got into safety patrol, she was excited to have a neon yellow vest that came with a little badge on it but when she tried to tell her mom; it was as if safety patrol meant nothing to her. When she told her about how she got into the TV station, she just shrugged it off and told her it was good. The only time Luna’s mother actually focuses on Luna’s successes is when she goes to Parent-Teacher Conference and Mrs. Lewis tells her she is doing great in math, but that she needs to work more on my reading to get past her 5th grade reading level. Every time Mrs. Lewis would say that, that night her mother told her that Luna needs to be reading more, and then give her several books to read and tell her to write a summary of the books. Luna used to get out of doing it, but a majority of the time she couldn’t.
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