She saw her dad come back in, and she ran into his arms and gave him a big hug. Luna had to hold back all her tears because she needed a good dad hug from him. She knew if she started crying it wouldn’t be a restart, it would be a continuation. Luna had to think quickly on how to control her pain. She ended up digging her nails into her skin. She wouldn’t release her nails until she knew she was in the clear from her dad. He released her from the hug and immediately said, “are you ready to go dress shopping?”
She forgot he was going to buy her graduation dress and shoes. She was so focused on the arguments that she was clearly winning that she forgot she was graduating in a couple of months. She forgot that she and Oliver were going to be with each other for another three years and possibly another four years for high school. She missed Oliver.
“Yeah, let me just get dressed. Can everyone come with us? The more people there, the more opinions I’ll have.” Luna needed to find a dress that made her look like a princess.
“Sure, let me ask Laurissa and Sammy if they want to tag along with us.” They both walked toward the kitchen. She had to mouth “please,” to make sure they said yes or had at least one of them with us. She didn’t trust herself with her dad right now. She wanted to scream her head off, but she knew she couldn’t. She knew she needed time, time to explain the whole restart thing to them.
“Hey, Luna and I are going dress shopping for her graduation. Do you want to join us?” They could see that she needed them more than anything.
Laurissa said, “I’ll go with you guys. Plus, someone has to help her zip up her dresses in the dressing room.” Luna released a quiet sigh of relief.
“Awesome, then let’s eat some breakfast and get ready and get this show on the road.” After her dad said that, she knew there was something off about him. She knew he didn’t want Laurissa there, because he wanted to have a conversation with Luna. Luna wasn’t having that conversation until the end of the week, when she knew that she’d be going home.
“Cool. Hey Luna, can you help me out with something first before you change out of your pajamas?” Luna stayed in the kitchen while her dad left. He didn’t just leave the kitchen, he left the entire house and went back to his place.
“Sure, what’s up?”
“Really? Explain to us what just happened, because it doesn’t make sense to us.”
“So, this started a year ago. I was annoyed with Raina, and her demon kids because they were constantly making me clean everything. Well, one day, I was having some issues because I was feeling homesick, which is normal whenever I stay with him for longer than two weeks. I didn’t want to clean or anything remotely close to it. I stayed in bed that entire day. When he came home from work, Raina told him I was being disrespectful and I wasn’t following her rules. He came in and asked me what was wrong and I said that I was homesick and that I wanted to call my mom. He asked if anyone came in to ask me to do anything, and I answered honestly, saying no, no one came in the entire day. I heard her yelling at Lucas to finish cleaning the kitchen, and then I heard a bang against the wall. I was assuming it was her hitting him against the wall, so I stayed in bed. I stayed out of their way. I didn’t want to deal with it, not on that day. When I came out of my room, Raina called me lazy, so I called her rude. It was only fair in my eyes. He didn’t like that, and I said, no, she has no right to call me names and not expect me to do the same to her.” Reliving that moment was rough because she could see all the reactions in the room. She could tell that this argument entertained Lucas, while Raina looked like she wanted to put Luna in her place with a quick slap in the face. Luna knew that the minute Raina touched her, she would call the police.
Luna continued telling the story before her time ran out, “I was told by my mother that if she tries to lay a hand on me again that my mother would come here and show her who is messing with. Before you ask, yes, Raina tried to hit me during that summer because I was doing my summer reading and she wanted me to clean the living room, which was spotless since I cleaned it the day before when she asked me. So I snapped at her, telling her she didn’t own me and I didn’t owe her anything because she wasn’t my mother and she never was. That was when he just said, let’s restart today. Luna, you will do your chores they ask you to do; and my sweet love, you will calm down when talking to my daughter. From then on, whenever he came home from work to see Raina and I arguing because she liked acting like she was my mother, he would restart the moment.” She could tell that Laurissa and Sammy had over a million questions, but she could only answer a few of them.
“So, because of the arguments you would have with the wicked witch, your father took it upon himself to just restart time instead of coming up with a solution?”
“Yeah, pretty much. Now he uses it on me when we have arguments about how I didn’t want to see him and how I didn’t care much for Paige because he chose her over me.”
“Luna, you know that’s not true. I know your dad isn’t the best, but he didn’t choose between you or Paige. He loves you both equally.” Luna wished that was true, but it wasn’t. She knew it wasn’t.
“I know, Laurissa, but when you see it from my eyes. I have to fight myself not to say the wrong things in front of him. I can say anything in front of my mother. She doesn’t make me restart the day after a horrible argument or if I say something that was true that they didn’t like. I don’t have to walk on glass for them. Why do I have to walk on glass for him?” She knew she wasn’t wrong. What was worse was that she never gets an answer to that question. The minute after she says that line, right before either Sammy or Laurissa say anything, her dad comes back into their house from the back. Luna was almost done getting ready. All she had to do was her hair. Luna brought an outfit over after Laurissa went to pick her up. She could tell her dad was crying, but she wasn’t allowed to ask because she knew it had to do with his choice in restarting the weekend to make himself feel like a “good dad.” She went to the bathroom to finish getting ready, with no interruptions. Luna looked at the mirror and mouthed her phrases, “I am okay. I am safe. No one deserves my tears.” She said it to herself three times before she left the bathroom.
Comments